Going forward

I lost my Grams this week on Tuesday 3rd of June. It was tough, really tough. But I guess because of my previous eureka moment, I remembered to allow myself to grieve, to be vulnerable and strong. I went over to my aunt (which my mom is staying with) yesterday and two other of my aunts were there. Picking songs and pictures for the funeral. I felt privileged to be there and to be asked my opinion. We all cried at one point or another and we also cried together. Being vulnerable, grieving together. As a family. For the first time in my life I now know what being strong but vulnerable at the same time is. I wasn't ashamed of my feelings, I just let them come. It was liberating. I know I am not done grieving but at least I am allowing myself to live it. Allowing myself to heal. I am happy about this because it is good progress. Can you imagine what I have repressed and denied myself over the years? Phew!! I can breath now.

Progress is not measured with a clock. It is personal to each and everyone of us, as long as I am walking forward then I'm not stuck. There is nothing worse than being stuck. I want to grow, I want to go forward with my gifts and help others, help myself. It's not going to be an easy journey I know that and I am looking forward to it. Bring it on!!